This is also a real-life case. The two perspectives on Chico were both held by the same teacher! One is her formal account for school records. The other is her rather more frank admissions made to me confidentially.
Mandy’s formal statement
'Chico would not settle down at the beginning of class and open his book. I asked him again and again but he still did nothing. He was distracting the other pupils. When I spoke to him he started to argue and refused to go to the withdrawal room when asked to do so. I called the Head of Year who took him to out of class’
Mandy’s confidential admissions and insights
‘He drives me mad. I feel myself being drawn into this role of the 'bitchy teacher'. I try to stop myself, but in the end I cannot. It's as if he wants to force me to do this. One time I gave him a real dressing down and he collapsed like a balloon and got on with his work. I could see his feelings were hurt, and it made me feel so guilty. I know I can crush him, but I won’t do it. On the other hand, … he’s driving me mad!'
I had talked to all the teachers who taught Chico. Some had much more positive perspectives to share. They shared powerfully emotive vignettes which cast Chico in a different light, and Mum had shared her story of family poverty and deprivation, and a violent father. As Mandy shared her story with me, I shared these inside perspectives with her.
Chico’s now conduct seemed more understandable. I suggested
- always talking to the deflated and anxious boy, regardless of the face he was showing her at the time.
- giving him less attention (if possible) when his conduct was disruptive during class and instead...
- talking to him before and/or after the class for a minute or two, to give reassurance and encouragement and discuss any issues 1:1.
(Chico was the sort of boy who could never back down in front of his peers, but 1:1 would be much more approachable).
This strategy, together with shifts in outlook by other staff, changed the social environment for Chico. Over time, he came to feel he belonged in the school. He could still be a pain but the more tolerant and empathic reponses by staff shifted the trajectory in a positive direction.